Spring Break
Viva Ariva? No Gracias.
Ralph MacDonald
Issue date: 12/3/08 Section: Entertainment
There are times when, as a journalist, I am a no-good smut peddler. I have gone as far as to give a porn theatre free publicity and am striving in this issue to help a bunch of under-aged lightweights picks the best cheap whiskey to deposit into the nearest Glassell urinal or shower stall.
So I am an unlikely candidate to balk at endorsing a tobacco product on moral grounds. I believe we are all aware of the health risks tobacco products pose at this point, and tobacco is stress relieving, creates a pleasant buzz, and can stimulate the mind during a late night of work. In short, it is a wonderful drug for your average college student.
Needless to say, I was excited to when Virginia's Finest tobacco company sent me their cutting-edge product, Ariva, for trial and, presumably, some hardcore pimping. So here goes: Ariva stands out amongst all other tobacco products for two main reasons. First, it comes in capsule form-think a cigarette in a breath mint. Secondly, it is not the least bit satisfying. It is a drug designed for the college kid who needs their fix in class, the professional stuck in a meeting, or any other person who just cannot wait fifty minutes for bad taste, throat discomfort, and mild nausea.
Ariva delivers no buzz, and is probably destined to be handed out by under-handed anti-drug fascists at middle school assemblies to prevent the kids from ever considering tobacco again.
So I am an unlikely candidate to balk at endorsing a tobacco product on moral grounds. I believe we are all aware of the health risks tobacco products pose at this point, and tobacco is stress relieving, creates a pleasant buzz, and can stimulate the mind during a late night of work. In short, it is a wonderful drug for your average college student.
Needless to say, I was excited to when Virginia's Finest tobacco company sent me their cutting-edge product, Ariva, for trial and, presumably, some hardcore pimping. So here goes: Ariva stands out amongst all other tobacco products for two main reasons. First, it comes in capsule form-think a cigarette in a breath mint. Secondly, it is not the least bit satisfying. It is a drug designed for the college kid who needs their fix in class, the professional stuck in a meeting, or any other person who just cannot wait fifty minutes for bad taste, throat discomfort, and mild nausea.
Ariva delivers no buzz, and is probably destined to be handed out by under-handed anti-drug fascists at middle school assemblies to prevent the kids from ever considering tobacco again.
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